Why I became a doula

​In my early twenties I was far from pursuing an interest in anything birth related. I was a young wife, knew I wanted to have kids “someday,” and primarily focused on using my degree in early childhood education. My interest was children, and teaching hem things they needed to know in life…the most rewarding moments were seeing a “light bulb” go off in their head when they finally got a concept or had a moment of accomplishment due to what I had taught them! I taught for 2 years and then became pregnant with our son.

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My teaching career took a pause during my pregnancy, as my husband and I began to learn about this thing called “birth” that was going to happen to us for the first time. We decided to take a Bradley childbirth class, where we discovered the typical things you learn about in a childbirth class: stages of labor, anatomy, and comfort measures. In addition, though, there was an emphasis on my husband’s responsibility of being my coach for labor, and learning information about birth in order to better understand and help me through the process. We also learned about the benefits of a doula and how they can support the couple in various ways during birth and remain with you continuously throughout the experience. There was also an emphasis on preventative things I could do to encourage having a low risk pregnancy and birth. We were also exposed to an awareness of learning about my birth options before labor, including the benefits and risks of various choices. We felt prepared for this big event, as much as we were able to be at the time, hired a doula, and soon thereafter experienced birth.

​It seemed manageable in my mind but labor brought unexpected things that would continue to shape my thoughts on birth and this thing called doula support. I labored with my son for 45 hours, chose to transfer from a birth center to hospital, and deviated from most of my carefully thought out birth plan. In the end, my birth did not turn out like I thought it would, but through it all we were supported by a doula. I knew that a doula would help me with challenges during birth, but I did not imagine how helpful it would turn out to be for my husband! He was absolutely drained from lack of sleep and eating, and experienced great concern for his wife and baby for long hours.  I am SO glad that we were both supported continuously through each unexpected step by this woman called a “doula.” 

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​That’s not the end of the story…after walking away from this birth experience we realized that you can be as prepared as possible for birth but still experience things outside of your plan. Although my baby was happy and healthy in the end, I struggled with my experience and had several fears of birth now. This carried me into my next pregnancy where we hired another doula and were led to more thoughts on birth and doula support. We took a Hypnobabies birthing class, which encouraged us to address our fears, and fill our minds with positive birth affirmations. I regained some hope that every birth is different, and my body proved to be quite capable of delivering a baby so peacefully and naturally. My daughter was born quickly and unexpectedly at home with my husband as the baby catcher. Our midwife and doula offered support over the phone, and continued with postpartum care in our home after the delivery. Although our doula was not there supporting us throughout a long labor this time, she was extremely helpful during the pregnancy period in listening to our past experience and fears, and helping us address that so it was not a hindrance in our next birth. In addition to our faith, I know that our doula’s encouragement was instrumental in helping us to be so calm for this birth. 

My births were some of the most monumental moments in my life that shaped me, and these women called “doulas” were very instrumental in the process as well. I began to read more about doula support and birth and my interest continued to peak. Among my reading I became aware of various birth choices, from water births options to VBACS, to mother centered cesarean options. I also became aware of other women who had their own birth stories to share, all being from a variety of situations. Of course I came across the seemingly perfect scenarios of babies being born with no complications, mother’s feeling in control and heard by their care providers, breastfeeding success, and smiles on everyone’s faces. However, I also encountered stories of women who felt unprepared and dissatisfied with their experience, felt pressured by care providers to make choices they were not comfortable with, did not feel listened to or respected in their birth plan, felt loss of control, alone and scared in their experience, dealt with postpartum depression, unsuccessful breastfeeding, and felt disconnected from their baby. Although this extreme description of birth does not belong to every woman, it does belong to many and these feelings are very real and deserve attention and validation! 
 
Because of my personal experiences with birth and doula support, researching, and speaking with other moms, I decided to follow my interest in becoming a birth doula. I want to help pregnant women feel prepared and supported for their birth in every way possible. This includes them having a care provider who will respect their own unique birth plan. I want moms to have the information they need to make informed choices. I do not want a mom to feel pressured into having a birth that is my ideal, or anyone else’s. A mother should feel good about her choices, even if it means deviating from her initial birth plan while she is laboring. A woman deserves to have continuous care during birth that focuses on her physical and emotional needs, and advocates for her wishes. After birth, a mother deserves to still have the focus on her, making sure she receives postpartum support in reviewing her experience, feeding her baby, caring for herself and her baby, dealing with postpartum emotions, or needing to find other support resources in the community. 

​In my journey I have become a wife and mother, and I still enjoy teaching my own children and seeing that light bulb go off when they learn something new…and now to add to my joy, I love learning about birth and taking on the role of a doula. I see that same “light bulb” go off in some women, where they feel empowered, or learn something new about birth, their bodies, baby, or choices. It is my pleasure to serve women in this way. I am thankful for my personal birth experiences, and wisdom from local birth professionals that will help me serve mothers in our community. I am happy to now support women through this wonderful thing called birth!